AAPI
TO ALL PEOPLE OF ASIAN, ASIAN-AMERICAN, AND PACIFIC ISLANDER ANCESTRY/DIASPORIC COMMUNITIES: LET’S UNRAVEL THE IMPACT OF INTERGENERATIONAL TRAUMA AND WORK TOGETHER TO HEAL AND BREAK THE CYCLE.
Has anyone ever told you:
“If you care about me, you will do this for me.”
“Don’t tell others about what happens in our family.”
“Don’t be difficult.”
“Why can’t you be more like ______.”
“I know you can do better.”
“It’s not that hard. You can do it, but you’re just lazy.”
“I am being hard on you because I care.”
“You never do anything right.”
“I went through so much worse than you. It can’t be that bad.”
You are selfish when you think about yourself.
EVEN AFTER HEARING THEM A MILLION TIMES, THE NEGATIVE COMMENTS HURT. YOU ARE RESENTFUL, FRUSTRATED, AND SAD THAT YOUR FAMILY CANNOT BE MORE THAN WHO THEY ARE. YOU FEEL GUILTY, ASHAMED, AND ANXIOUS WHEN YOU THINK ABOUT DISTANCING YOURSELF FROM THEM.
When we hear ongoing negative criticism from our loved ones, we can internalize the hurtful messages and start telling ourselves that we will never be good enough. There is a lot of stigma and shame regarding mental health in the AAPI community. While the narrative around mental health is shifting to a more positive light, personally believing that we are worthy and learning how to prioritize our needs can be an ongoing struggle.
Going to therapy can provide a safe space to unpack the burden and shame without judgement or retaliation. If you are ready to live the life that you want, not the one that others want for you, then reach out now to schedule a free consultation together.